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How To Say “I Do” Every Day - 11 Ways to Perk up a Chaldean Marriage
By Huda Metti :: Tuesday, April 21, 2009 :: 67933 Views :: Health & Fitness, Living & Lifestyle

Michigan, USA – “If you’ve ever gone a month without spending any real quality time with your spouse, you know how negatively it can affect your marriage. All relationships need to be nurtured, and none more so than our relationship with our spouse,” says Eddie Kuza from Farmington Hills, Michigan. 

Kuza attended the new Couples Club at Mother of God Chaldean Catholic church with his wife.  The Couples Club organizes fun outings and events for engaged and married Chaldean couples.  “The Club is fun.  The group organizes some great activities, like dinner and a play, or a small trip up North, or great tickets to a basketball game.” 

Kuza says the goal of the Couples Club is to nurture strong marital relationships and create opportunities for Chaldeans to have fun.  Successful Chaldean marriages may be best seen as a triangle, with God at the top and each partner at the lower corners. The closer we draw to God, the closer we’ll be to each other.  “Marriage is not a ‘done deal’ at the altar; it’s a continuous, daily ‘I do.’ Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads, which sew people together through the years.”

The Chaldean Couples Club event brochure offered these wonderful tips to perk up a relationship.

Though it may seem impossible to spend quality time alone with your spouse, it can be done. It just takes a little planning and creativity. The Couples Club is here to help.  The following ideas can get you started:

1) Celebrate Monthly Anniversaries
Each month on the same date you were married, get a babysitter for the kids and go out on the town. A walk in the park, ice cream, dinner, a concert, miniature golf, a picnic, or ice-skating, can do a lot to keep the relationship strong. Chaldean couples are not likely to forget the reason they got married when you’re both celebrating it monthly.

2) Attend a Marriage Retreat
The Chaldean Club along with other local marital clubs host marriage retreats that are held year-round throughout the state, usually on weekends, these retreats often include marriage/inspirational speakers, beautiful scenery, good food, activities, and plenty of time to be alone with your spouse.

3) Gift of Time
Surprise your mate by giving your spouse the gift of time. Reschedule a meeting to spend extra time together. On weekends, forgo a favorite activity to spend the time with your mate instead. A gift of time speaks volumes and can do a lot to strengthen your marriage.

4) Be Lively at Parties
Take advantage of Chaldean parties. As you attend the event with your spouse, join in the dancing, good music, and fine dinning.  Bring a small gift for your spouse and exchange it at the event. Be romantic and communicate to your spouse why you love them.

5) Cut Out The TV
Once the kids are in bed, resist the urge to crash on the couch in front of the TV. Studies show that couples who watch an above-average amount of TV are significantly less satisfied with their relationships than couples who watch less than the average amount. Instead, put on a music CD, talk, play board games, read to one another, or plan fun events together.

6) Walk Together
Each evening after the supper dishes have been cleared away, take a walk (or two) around the block. This works especially well if you have children old enough to spend brief periods at home without supervision or who are mature and responsible enough to look after younger siblings. The evening walks are not only invigorating but also allow for good, private conversations.

7) Weekend Getaway
Each year, make it a tradition to get away for a weekend alone with your spouse. Schedule a specific weekend just for the two of you, and don’t change it for any other event. Keeping the timing the same each year makes it easier on everyone; it’s not only expected, it gives you and your spouse something to look forward to.

8) Share Memories
If possible, return to your childhood towns — if not physically, then mentally. Talk about the streets you walked, the homes you lived in, the schools you attended, the playgrounds you played at, the friends you had, etc. Knowing about your mate’s childhood helps to know them better.

9) Romantic Space
Make your bedroom “off-limits” to kids’ stuff. Instead, fill the room with pictures of you and your partner, pre-kids, to help remind you of how you fell in love. Keep the room clutter-free, as having toys underfoot just isn’t conducive to romance. Place scented candles and flowers throughout the room, and leave each other love notes under the pillows or sheets.

10) Small Surprises
Plan small surprises that show why you love your spouse.  Insert little notes in their coat pockets, drop by work with a special lunch, leave a small gift in the car the night before, call to just say you love them, send them e-mail poetry, or bring home their favorite dessert treat.  Be sure the small gift ties into why you love your spouse.  Have fun with the gift giving.

11) Unique Dates
Plan unique dates that create memories.  Do things you have not done as a couple.  The excitement of sharing and building memories together reinforces the love in a relationship. 

The brochure ends with a compelling note for Chaldean couples.  “Chaldeans work very hard.  Time can slip through their fingers very easy.  The priorities of paying the bills and dealing with family emergencies can make any spouse feel ignored or forgotten.  Your spouse is the person you’ll spend the rest of your life with, it makes sense to invest in your marriage now. Commit today to spending more one-on-one time with your spouse — you won’t regret it! “

St. Joseph, MI USA

St. Joseph Chaldean Catholic Church
2442 E. Big Beaver Rd.
Troy, MI 48083
Tel: (248) 528-3676
Fax: (248) 524-1957

Congregation Organizer:
Rev. Michael J. Bazzi

Church Constructing Pastor:
Rev. Sarhad Y. Jammo

Current Pastor:
Msgr. Zouhair Toma

Parochial Vicar:
Rev. Ayad Hanna

 Current Pastor: Msgr. Zouhair Toma

Msgr. Zouhair Toma (Kejbou) was born in Telkaif, Iraq in 1947.  He was ordained a priest in Baghdad, Iraq in 1968, and accepted his first assignment to serve the community of Baquba.  The Monsignor’s leadership skills and organizational talents along with his mastery of theology were immediately evident.  He later assisted Sts. Peter and Paul in Al-Salehia, and St. George in New Baghdad.

In August, 1978 Monsignor Toma was called to serve the growing community of persecuted Chaldeans finding refuge in Australia.   Being the fist Chaldean priest to arrive in Australia he quickly established a parish for the Chaldeans in Sydney to serve their social and spiritual needs.  The parish was named after St. Thomas the Apostle and built a rectory. 

In 1989, for his incredible work he was granted the title of Monsignor, Chaldean Patriarchal Vicar for Australia and New Zealand.  Continuing his passionate work to serve the Chaldean community the Monsignor moved the Parish Center to a more accessible location and built a large church campus featuring a modern community center, residence quarters, and administrative offices in 1995. 

In 2003, Monsignor Toma added a magnificent church to replace the previous one in order to serve the fast growing community and also opened two other centers.  The first was Our Lady Guardian of Plants in Melbourne, and the second was Mar Addai the Apostle in Auckland, New Zealand.  Mar Addai in New Zealand included two very large churches along with rectories and community centers.  Overseeing the Patriarchal Vicariate for 28 years, he managed to inspire six more priests to help minister to the fast growing Chaldean community. 

In August 2006, Monsignor chose to assist the St. Thomas the Apostle Diocese in the U.S. as more Catholic churches were being built in America and address the growing need.  On October 2006, Monsignor was incardinated and appointed Pastor of St. Joseph Parish in Troy.